You Are Driving Me Crazy!!!

I have a lot of issues with other drivers. It doesn’t really matter who it is. I may be riding along as a passenger or driving and bitching about observing the others on the road with me, but it’s almost a certainty that I will encounter something that I find irritating.

Here are my top 5 annoyances in no particular order.

Overly cautious drivers. I know you are saying “But Amy, you have 2 small children, you should be thankful that there are cautious drivers.” WRONG! Overly cautious drivers are more of a danger than those speeding (me) down the freeway. I’m not a crazy speeder – for one, I’m driving a ’98 Explorer, she just doesn’t have the pick up she used to. And two, yes, my kids are in the car with me 95% of the time. So when you are slow poking it along, you are putting me and my children at risk because now I have to pass you and give you a dirty look, thus making me take my eyes off the road.
Vanity plates or bumper stickers that aren’t funny. Just think of how much less excruciating it would be to be stuck behind a car in traffic or just at a light if they had something funny to read on the back of their car. I recently saw a license plate on an old red minivan that simply read: AREDVAN. I laughed for 2 exits.
Drivers that creep up to a traffic light regardless of the displayed light color. I live close to a fairly busy intersection and I almost never go straight through the light. I am usually turning, which means sitting in a turning lane. If I miss the turning light, I will sit for up to 4 ½ minutes, depending on the time of day. Four minutes! Who has that kind of time?! And what is even worse is if your slow ass gunned it at the last minute to get through the light and left me sitting there. Grrrrrrr
People that don’t obey traffic signs. I know, this whole thing sounds like a contradiction, but really, I’m guilty of speeding and that’s it. There is another corner, not far from my house where 3 lanes merge into 2, but then a turning lane opens up literally 20 feet after that.
The street doesn’t even really narrow at all, but the sign says to get your ass over to the left and then you can get back over to the right to turn. Without fail, whenever I drive this way, some jackoff completely ignores the huge white arrows painted on the street, the bright yellow sign with the merging lane picture and just barrels through to the turning lane.

Inevitably, I get stuck behind said vehicle and there are certainly no funny anecdotes on the back of the car to bring my blood pressure down to a normal rate.

Lane budgers. You know who I’m talking about. The people who see the huge line of cars exiting and drive as far as they can outside of that long line of cars and try to squeeze in at the last minute to avoid sitting there like the rest of us. To quote George Costanza, “We’re living in a society!” Some people actually do miss the exit and are forced to pull this little stunt, I actually did on Saturday and I was so embarrassed! I gave the customary wave and even mouthed a “THANK YOU”! to my fellow driver to let him know I wasn’t one of the inconsiderate d-bags that he was probably expecting.

OK, so I'm guilty of speeding and taking pictures while I drive, but I knew I would be driving that way today and had my phone ready to snap a couple of pictures.